Pre Hike 18 February 2018

When I was a child, on rainy days my younger sister and I would take a couple of outdoor reclining lounges and fold them up so that the foot rest and head rest created two walls.  Then we would take large sheets of clear plastic and drape them over the walls to create a canopied roof.   We would sit under the tent-like structure with our books and games and let the water cascade down around us.    The sounds of the rain on the plastic lulled us into a quiet reverie of make believe and wonder.   We would sit for hours just enjoying the experience of being outdoors in the rain but safe and warm and dry under our self-made structure.   I was reminded of these memories when I was hiking a section of the Colorado Trail in 2016 with my older sister and her husband.  We had just made camp and it started to rain.  We went into our shelters and I lay there watching the drops of water splash against the rain fly.  And the pelting sounds became a steady sound score upon which I began to drift into sleep.   I was warm and safe and dry and completely comforted by the experience.  

I often think about the 4 days and 3 nights on an early spring Appalachian Trail hike with my dear friend Christiana last year.   It was the most exciting hike I’ve taken to date – mainly due to the wild and cold weather.  Every time I venture out, I learn new lessons about hiking and how I can overcome certain conditions. This time it was cold with wind and rain.  It got down to 32 degrees that first night at Wiley Shelter.   The rain hitting the roof of the shelter was filled with drama and fast paced energy.   I lay there in my Western Mountaineering Alpine Light, warm and safe as the air swirled around me. The wind made variations of sweeping passages through the trees.   Around  11:30 that night I realized that the rain had stopped.  It was snowing!  I looked out of the shelter and saw the pale white on the barks of the trees.  My heart swelled from the happiness I experienced at that moment.   Yes!  This is what I want at this point in my life. I want to be here with my dear friend Christiana sharing this magical experience that no one else will get to share.   And an hour later, I got up to pee  in the cold night air.  The night was now calmer and quiet and I basked in the solitude before making my way back to the shelter where I promptly hit my head on one of the slats in the ceiling as the roof sloped.  Fun!  Christiana of course heard the smack and asked me if I was okay.   I was.  Just surprised and embarrassed.   Lesson learned, use the headlamp at night!

The days after that were filled with steep climbs and cold wet feet and then sudden bursts of great beauty and dignified awe.  I loved it!  And I was so inspired and encouraged to continue my plans for hiking the PCT.  I didn’t want to get off the trail. I wanted to continue.  I wanted to be rustic and dirty and strong and courageous. 

I am still very much in the final planning stages.  Just when I thought I had my gear sorted, I decided to make some changes.  I had been using an Osprey Exos 58 for all of my hikes to date.  And while I really love the pack, I thought I could get something that weighed a little less and continue to try and lower my base weight.   So I just ordered a Zpacks Arc Haul with some accessories.  It will weigh almost a pound less than the Osprey.  And it will still allow me to carry loads up to 40 pounds  - not that I every really want to carry that much weight.  But the extra water I will need in Southern California has me a bit worried.  I am hoping to bring my base weight in around 14 pounds.  I don’t want to be an ultralight hiker.  At least not right now.  I still consider myself a novice hiker with so much to learn.  I don’t want to worry too much about base weight.  But I do want to make smart informed decisions about the gear I will carry.   The next 3 months will be filled with more research, testing my gear and making final adjustments, completing a planned resupply that will most likely change on the trail  - and then change again.   I have currently taken myself to Ashland OR in my resupply blueprint.   I am taking some classes at REI – map reading and navigation (my second time taking this class) as well as NOLS Wilderness First Aid.  And I am reading and trying to absorb material geared toward mentally preparing for a through hike.   In reading the PCT Class of 2018 Facebook Page, it seems that some hikers are already done with all resupply and boxes packed and gear done and they’re ready!!  But I am not like that.  Yes, I want to plan of course and be ready (and I will be!) but I am still maintaining my full time job. I am still hitting the gym 5x a week and taking dance classes.  I am still living my life in New York City.   But I will be ready.  I will cross each threshold in preparation for my hike.  I can’t really prep the few resupply boxes I am planning till I get to Ohio in April.  Why pack them here in NYC only to have to move them to my sister’s in Ohio?  I will have almost a month in Ohio to finalize those boxes. 

And yes, I do feel overwhelmed.  And yes I just want to have the pre hike done and be on my way to San Diego and then on my way to taking those first steps.   What will that be like?  Will I have a profound moment with a giant step of monumental importance.  Or will I simply start walking without even a glance back at the southern terminus and get on with it.

I guess I’ll find out.   Why is my heart racing?