Pre Hike 02 March 2018

 

Many years ago a friend gave me an antique rotating globe of the earth as a gift along with a beautiful and intricate handmade card.  Inside the card, he had written “Michou, the world is yours”.  I’ve kept them both over the years.  As I begin the arduous process of packing up and moving out of my apartment, I thought about just throwing the globe out.  Why pay to keep it in storage or move it back to Ohio?  The base is slowly rusting and it’s worth nothing.  But this rotating earth on a rusting base has become a symbolic reminder that the world is huge and filled with endless possibilities.  Each path chosen has an impact filled with personal importance.  The struggle to succeed in a particular direction doesn’t always mean the kind of success one initially envisions.   And for myself, I have longed for a creative life in dance.  I’ve been fortunate to have had many extraordinary experiences  - each one building upon the last to create a tableau of personal achievements.   Yet at this moment in my life, I feel myself contemplating the missed opportunities.   I find myself longing for new experiences.  The world is yours.  Yes, but I don’t want the whole world, I just want to know that I have the freedom to be expansive and filled with huge ideas for art and life.  And thus this journey on the Pacific Crest Trail excites my curious adventurous wild heart.  For five months, the world will be a pale dirt path about a foot wide that extends 2600 miles. 

Today I finally gave in to the realization that in a month I would be moving out of New York City.  Knowing that many of my belongings would be kept in storage, I researched facilities near me and contacted a moving company to handle the move.  I also started posting ads online to sell most of my furniture.   And finally I made a rigorous effort to book an SUV to pack up what I would need in Ohio and of course all of my hiking gear.  I will drive myself back to Ohio for the month of April.  And then on May 3rd I will depart for San Diego.  Since I am not fond of flying, I booked myself a trip on Amtrak.  And I am actually very excited for the train trip!  After I switch trains in Chicago, I will travel through the Southwest   - New Mexico, Arizona and then California.  I’ve never been to California and am so eager to see those lands.  I transfer again in Los Angeles before arriving in San Diego.  And then it will all begin.   And then I will see the Southern Terminus and take those first steps.   I still find it difficult to fathom what I am about to attempt.   And I admit, today as I began looking around my apartment I started to doubt my decision.  What am I doing?!  Look at what I am giving up?!!   But those thoughts were quickly replaced by the confidence I have in my choice.   And I know that when I start hiking, that will be my focus.  I just want it to start. I want to have the research and preparations and moves completed.  I want to hike!   I want to move!

There is a Nor’easter whipping through New York City today.  The turbulent air and gusts of rain turning to snow then turning to rain excite me.   It’s a perfect day here.   I am sitting at my desk (soon to be in storage!) watching the snow billow under the streetlights.   March is always an exciting month.   It’s the month I was born.  And I have always loved that people refer to March as being both a lion and a lamb.   I love the passion, wild energy and calming sweetness evocative in that expression.   And I love that I possess a passionate drive that billows and blows and then is subdued and calm and suddenly extraordinarily quiet.